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Copyright © 2017-2019 Nicole Kay Riebe. All rights reserved.

Changes

January 31, 2018

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I'm going to write mostly about my move, but other things from my life might bleed in here and there.

Mostly experiences and all.

 

Kal and I have been looking at moving in together since fall; we thought it wouldn't happen for a year, but the stars kind of aligned in such a way that it became possible a whole half year early. As I sit here in our new apartment writing this, I'm still in a can't-believe-it daze. It was a whole lot of research and adulting crammed into a month, but somehow we managed to get our own place. Not too bad. Rent amount is decent, space is good, community is gated and quiet. We're close to all kinds of amenities, and my cat's here. I got a new car before I moved, but I'm still running around like a madwoman trying to get everything settled. However, it's satisfying to go to sleep and remember what I have here is from my own two hands, my own stubbornness, and my own hard work. (Kal's too, ofc.) Yeah, hurdles have popped up, but as with everything in life I get so spiteful and angry when things don't go my way that I maneuver around/over/under them until they are but a distant bump in the road. (I'm a healer main. I'm good at adjusting.)

 

Decorating your own place is fun, but unlike the Sims, there is no cheat box to magically generate that sweet extra $$$. We're buying things slowly and that totally makes decorating not as fun, but I know it'll be worth it in the end when everything's up. We could have gotten more, but part of the fun in living together is choosing furniture and the like together. :P My parents and friends have been incredibly supportive and have gifted us with a good amount of stuff too! #tooblessedtostress

 

Unpacking my things has made me acutely aware of how much shit I have. And how over the past couple years my urge to hoard has thankfully lessened. My attachment to some things has faded; things both material and mental. Upon unpacking all my cosplay wigs I'm left to thinking about how I will likely never use these again; generally I think I'm too old to cosplay (even though I don't look it. lol), and not to mention the fact literally all of my costumes have been worn Once then never again. Don't think I'll be breaking that habit anytime soon. 

 

I keep stumbling across things and feeling confused as to why I kept them. Being able to throw useless things out feels good, kinda makes me feel responsible. I have been dealing with my feelings of attachment lately; my attachment to people, social media, etc. Especially social media; I used to feel like I had to be active on it all the time and "get noticed" on it, but since I accepted going at my own pace and posting whatever, my social-media-related-stress has dropped to nonexistent. When I let go of my attachment to a certain status quo, or people, it makes me feel much better about myself. Since 2015-2016 my view of myself has improved immensely. I still get pings of anxiety but it's gradually getting better and easier to manage. 

 

It's nice to unearth old things of mine and take a gander at my growth, though. Be it old art or old ideas or old awards or whatever. It's nice to know I never stopped growing. It means I can still keep growing, no matter how slow I feel.

 

I think for moving in this weekend, having a majority of my boxes gone and put away is pretty good. I'm just gonna take it slow from here on out because I feel pretty tired and school starts next week.

 

Being domestic and (basically) married is pretty fun. Since I work most of the day Kal is the one who does a majority of the cooking and cleaning. Amazing! Actually, so far, he's done all of the cooking, LOL. It'll probably even out more once we both are back in school.

 

We get married this weekend.

 

I'll finally be able to change my horrendous-to-spell and even-worse-to-sign surname. :P

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